Type 3 (The Achiever) and Type 9 (The Peacemaker)

I saw this personality test from a friend's site (thanks Tobie). I am surprised, though, that two personality traits came out. Does that mean I have a split personality? Hehehe. You be the judge?

===========================

The Achiever (the Three)

Achivers are energetic, optimistic, self-assured, and goal oriented.

How to Get Along with Me

• Leave me alone when I am doing my work.


• Give me honest, but not unduly critical or judgmental, feedback.


• Help me keep my environment harmonious and peaceful.


• Don't burden me with negative emotions.


• Tell me you like being around me.


• Tell me when you're proud of me or my accomplishments.

What I Like About Being a Three

• being optimistic, friendly, and upbeat


• providing well for my family


• being able to recover quickly from setbacks and to charge ahead to the next challenge


• staying informed, knowing what's going on


• being competent and able to get things to work efficiently


• being able to motivate people

What's Hard About Being a Three

• having to put up with inefficiency and incompetence


• the fear on not being -- or of not being seen as -- successful


• comparing myself to people who do things better


• struggling to hang on to my success


• putting on facades in order to impress people


• always being "on." It's exhausting.

Threes as Children Often

• work hard to receive appreciation for their accomplishments


• are well liked by other children and by adults


• are among the most capable and responsible children in their class or school


• are active in school government and clubs or are quietly busy working on their own projects

The Peacemaker (the Nine)

Peacemakers are receptive, good-natured, and supportive. They seek union with others and the world around them.

How to Get Along with Me

• If you want me to do something, how you ask is important. I especially don't like expectations or pressure.


• I like to listen and to be of service, but don't take advatage of this.


• Listen until I finish speaking, even though I meander a bit.


• Give me time to finish things and make decisions. It's OK to nudge me gently and nonjudgmentally.


• Ask me questions to help me get clear.


• Tell me when you like how I look. I'm not averse to flattery.


• Hug me, show physical affection. It opens me up to my feelings.


• I like a good discussion but not a confrontation.


• Let me know you like what I've done or said.


• Laugh with me and share in my enjoyment of life.

What I Like About Being a Nine

• being nonjudgmental and accepting


• caring for and being concerned about others


• being able to relax and have a good time


• knowing that most people enjoy my company; I'm easy to be around


• my ability to see many different sides of an issue and to be a good mediator and facilitator


• my heightened awareness of sensations, aesthetics, and the here and now


• being able to go with the flow and feel one with the universe

What's Hard About Being a Nine

• being judged and misunderstood for being placid and/or indecisive


• being critical of myself for lacking initiative and discipline


• being too sensitive to criticism; taking every raised eyebrow and twitch of the mouth personally


• being confused about what I really want


• caring too much about what others will think of me


• not being listened to or taken seriously

Nines as Children Often

• feel ignored and that their wants, opinions, and feelings are unimportant


• tune out a lot, especially when others argue


• are "good" children: deny anger or keep it to themselves

Nines as Parents

• are supportive, kind, and warm


• are sometimes overly permissive or nondirective

Maisusulat ko ang pinakamalungkot na berso ngayong gabi

Pagsasalin ni Virgilio Almario sa "Tonight I Can Write" ni Pablo Neruda

- 09 Piano Solo.mp3 -
Maisusulat ko ang pinakamalungkot na berso ngayong gabi.

Maisusulat ko, halimbawa: "Mabituin ang gabi at nanginginig,
bughaw ang mga tala sa malayo."
Lumiligid sa langit ang simoy-gabi at umaawit.

Maisusulat ko ang pinakamalungkot na berso ngayong gabi.
Minahal ko siya, at minahal din niya ako paminsan-minsan.

Sa mga gabing ganito, ibinilanggo ko siya sa aking mga bisig.
Ulit-ulit ko siyang hinagkan sa lilim ng walang-hanggang langit.

Minahal niya ako, paminsan-minsan ko rin siyang minahal.
Sino ang hindi iibig sa kaniyang malalaki't mga matang tahimik.

Maisusulat ko ang pinakamalungkot na berso ngayong gabi.

Maiisip kasing hindi na siya akin.
Madaramang wala na siya sa akin.

Maririnig ang gabing malawak, at mas lumalawak kung wala siya.
At pumapatak sa kaluluwa ang bersong tila hamog sa pastulan.
Maano kung hindi siya mabantayan ng aking pag-ibig.

Mabituin ang gabi at hindi siya kapiling. Ito na ang lahat.
May umaawit sa malayo. Sa malayo.

Hindi mapanatag ang kaluluwa ko sa pagkawala niya.
Upang waring ilapit siya, hinahanap siya ng aking mata.

Hinahanap siya ng aking puso, at hindi siya kapiling.
Ganito rin ang gabing nagpapusyaw sa ganito ring mga punongkahoy.

Kami, sa tagpong iyon ang nagbago.
Hindi ko na siya mahal, natitiyak ko, ngunit minahal ko siya nang todo.

Hinahanap ng tinig ko ang simoy upang hipuin ang kaniyang pandinig.

Nasa iba. Siya'y nasa iba. tulad noong katalik siya ng aking mga halik.

Ang kaniyang tinig, malinaw na katawan.
Ang kaniyang matang walang-hanggan.

Hindi ko na siya mahal, natitiyak ko, ngunit baka mahal ko siya.
Napakaikli ng pag-ibig, napakahaba ng paglimot.

Dahil sa mga gabing ganito na ibinilanggo ko siya sa aking mga bisig
hindi mapanatag ang kaluluwa ko sa pagkawala niya.

Kahit ito na ang huling pighating ipapataw niya sa akin,
at ito ang huling mga bersong isusulat ko para sa kaniya.

Tonight I Can Write

by Pablo Neruda

Cinema Paradiso - Love Theme - Enio Morricone

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example, "The night is starry
and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance."

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. As she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.

Four Seasons of Loneliness

Waking up to a silent house...

A sense of loss...

Passed over for promotion (again)...

Disappointment...

A love that may not be reciprocated...

Emotional roller coaster...

Tears welling up in my eyes...

Sadness...

Dread...

Sorrow...

Despair...

Unos

Kasabay ng pagbuhos ng ulan ang pagtulo ng luha
Rumaragasa, umaagos, walang patid

Kasabay ng pagkulog ang panaghoy
Malakas, nagmamakaawa, puno ng hinagpis

Kasabay ng pagkidlat ang pagdilim ng paningin
Masakit, mahapdi, hitik sa pait.

Sana ay hindi na tumigil ang pag-bagyo
Para hindi mapansin ang unos ng nararamdaman
Para maikubli ang aking katauhan.

Kailan masisilayan ang pagliwanag ng langit?

Waiting for Godot

I am killing time. I have just been to a meeting and my next appointment is...wala na. What better way to kill time but to write?

So, musta? I have no agenda but to kill time. So I guess I will just let my thoughts ramble and my fingers type. Let's see how it goes....

So what do I want to write about? Let's see. Nothing in particular. Aaaarrrrrggggghhhh, ang hirap kasi maghintay ng oras. Nakakainip. Nakakabagot. Nakakabaog. Err, erase the last word. Hehe

Paghihintay. Haha. Tama, nakakainis ngang maghintay.

Waiting for someone to like you seems like ages. Waiting for a job opportunity to come is income lost. Waiting for the moment of ecstasy is wild imagination. Waiting for the perfect sexual encounter is fiction. Waiting for an acquaintance to be a friend is a process. Waiting for a friend to be a partner is treading on dangerous grounds. Waiting for a friend and partner to be intimate with you is vulnerability. Waiting for a relationship to grow and reciprocate is nurturing (and may involve a lot of pain).

Waiting for a response (to a message, a text, a query) is expectation. Waiting for that response to be favorable is anticipation. Waiting for that response to be unfavorable is defeatist. Waiting for the other to reach out is a possibility. Waiting for the other to love you without conditions is too much.

Waiting for the past to continue into the present is hoping. Waiting for the present to be as good as the past is idealizing. Waiting for a moment to freeze in time is romanticizing.

Waiting for your "shoulds" to be part of reality is dreaming. Waiting for "musts" to characterize your personality and those around you is imposition. Waiting for the other to change according to your standards is subjugation. Waiting for his/her standards to define you is cooptation.

Waiting for the moment to become vulnerable is courage. And wanting to bounce back when things go wrong is strength.

And writing this email and waiting for time to wind up to 6:30pm is------

Killing time? better time? Spent time? Aaahh, just sharing time with you.

Haha...ok, ok, that's not Bach or Exupery, that's just me.

I am done. 2:10pm and logging out....

Selfless Love, Anyone?

A few months ago, I got a call from Mico who was a friend of mine. Nope, he is no longer in pain. He is no longer anguished over his friendship with a colleague with whom he would have wanted a relationship. The “past perfect” in Mico’s case has just become “simple past”; he has learned to let go and put the best interests of his friend before his own.

I remember him truly disappointed then. Mico wanted to take their friendship to blossom into a relationship, but the other was not prepared to embrace the same. Mico wanted to pursue a meaningful relationship with his friend. But his friend could only offer a meaningful friendship. Mico wanted to be progressive; the other was conservative.

And so they had decided to separate ways; physically at first as his friend stayed behind in Europe to finish his studies and Mico had to go back to the Philippines. And emotionally as Mico could not fathom how this close friendship was suffocating both, while nurturing so much expectations that his friend was afraid or uncertain to meet.

So Mico had to relent to separation. Pain was second skin to him, but his respect, loyalty and friendship prevailed over his personal, selfish intentions. It was not easy, but he wanted his friend to be happy, even if that happiness would mean pursuing a relationship with someone else---and not with him.

Fate had a way of making their friendship stronger. Mico received messages from an anonymous guy. For a while, they exchanged messages, but when it came to a point when the anonymous guy explored possibilities of meeting and having a relationship soon, Mico thought that the anonymous texter might be a good match with his friend. And so Mr. Anonymous exchanged messages with Mico’s friend. They met, liked each other and are now an item together.

Did Mico feel pain? Did he regret having paired them off?

No, said Mico. “I only had the best intentions for my friend. I thought it would be painful, but it was not. It is liberating to be selfless.”

Selfless love, Mico calls it. And he laughs like an innocent child explaining it.

And selfless love, I intially thought, was about loving 'til it hurts. In Mico’s case, selfless love is loving ‘til it makes you smile.

No hurt, no lost love there.

Just peace of mind. And lots of love in return.

Postscript: Mico to this day has not even met his anonymous texter whom his friend is seeing at the moment. But he says they are happy with each other’s company. Mico is happy for both of them.

The Promise

by Kai

(NOTE: this is such a beautiful song. I hope it touches your heart the way it has touched mine. Enjoy!)

Kai - Promise - Kai

I turn back the hands of time
To see what I've left behind
All the memories within my heart
And deep within my mind
I see all the hardships I've endured
And I'm rest assured
That you'll be there beside me
Like you've always been time and again

And with all that's said and done
You've always been the one
To hold me on those rainy days
When I couldn't see the sun
And when all the clouds disappear
And my skies are clear
I feel your love shining down on me
Without your love
Where would I be?

Chorus1:
You were the one
Who wiped the tears from my eyes
It was your love that gave me life through my darkest times
You were the one
What you've given me I could never repay
All I can give to you is my loving embrace
Cause I live to see the smile upon your face
Day by day

Verse2:
I've promised to go on
Until my race is won
And the knowledge you have given me
I'll give to those I love
And I've learned that if I do succeed
Then I shall receive the promise of a brighter day
You give me hope, you give me faith

Chorus2:
You were the one
Who wiped the tears from my eyes (That's what you've done)
It was your love that gave me life through my darkest times
You were the one
What you've done me I could never repay
So I live my life according to your way
Cause I live to see that smile upon your face
Day, by day

Bridge:
Ooo, your love
It always pulled me through (Oh yeah)
And when I felt all hope was gone
There was always you (Yeah)
Until my dying day in my heart you'll always be
And I'm so thankful for the love you've given me
Now I see (Yeah)

Chorus3:
You were the one
Who wiped the tears from my eyes (You wiped the tears from my eyes)
It was your love that gave me life through my darkest times
You were the one
What you've done for me I could never repay
I won't fail you this I promise you today
Cause I'd die to see the tears come down your face (Oh no)
So I live in you, I will live in your name
The rest of my days

Don't you cry no more...

Oh no, no